*They say a happy marriage is built on love, trust, and a great sense of humor. Well, we’re here to help you tie the knot with laughter!
From wedding bells to honeymoon hilarities, our list of marriage puns will have you saying, “I do… love these jokes!” Whether you’re newly engaged, a longtime spouse, or just a fan of romance, these puns are the perfect plus-one to your day.
So, grab your bouquet and get ready to walk down the aisle of humor with us!
Classic Marriage Puns for Every Couple
“Marriage is a workshop… where the husband works and the wife shops!”
- My love for you is ring-ing true.
- You cake my breath away.
- We’re a match made in heaven—or at least in the buffet line.
- I knew you were the one—I just had to altar my expectations.
- Marriage is about give and take… mostly giving up the remote.
- I found my main squeeze, now life’s a peach!
- Love at first site—thanks to online dating!
- This wedding is going off without a hitch (except for the one at the altar).
- We’re just two peas in a matri-moan-ial pod.
- I love you with all my hearty-ever-after.
- You’re the icing on my wedding cake.
- Our love story is written in the vows.
- “I do” sounds better than “I guess so,” don’t you think?
- You’re my better half—and my better snack sharer.
- The secret to a great marriage? Kneading each other’s dough (and sharing the pizza).
- We’re tying the knot so tight, even Houdini couldn’t escape!
- My heart is wed-ding to yours.
- You’re the reason I’ve got love handles—too many date-night desserts!
- Marriage: where one person is always right, and the other is the husband.
- I put a ring on it, now she’s got me wrapped around her finger!
- We go together like bride and bloom.
- You stole my heart, now let’s elope before you change your mind!
- “Forever” is just another word for happily ever laughter.
- He put a ring on it, now I’m just basking in the fiancé-nce.
- Love isn’t perfect, but marriage is a perfect excuse to eat cake.
Wedding Bells & Bridal Bliss Puns
- You’re the veil to my heart.
- I promise to love, honor, and cherish every pizza night.
- Say “yes” to the dress and “oh no” to the wedding bill.
- You’re my something borrowed and my something blue-tiful.
- This love story deserves a standing ovation at the altar.
- Walking down the aisle like I own the bridal runway.
- Our love story is aisle-some.
- The reception is the real happily ever after—hello, open bar!
- My dress is white, but my heart is golden for you.
- I knew I was getting married when my fiancé started using the phrase “we need”.
- “I do” means forever brunch dates and late-night snacks together.
- The only thing better than wedding cake is a lifetime of dessert dates.
- A bouquet toss is just an excuse to show off my competitive side.
- A wedding is just a fancy way to say, “I really, really like you!”
- Forever sounds nice, but have you seen the buffet table?
- The honeymoon phase is great, but wait until we start stealing each other’s fries.
- You’re the bride-light of my life.
- I found my knight in shining cufflinks.
- Our love story deserves a happily ever laughter.
- I never knew wedding planning would include so many cake samples—best part yet!
- You complete me like a bride completes her checklist.
- Nothing says true love like matching bathrobes and shared streaming passwords.
- The secret to a happy marriage? Letting your partner have the last French fry.
- Love at first sight? More like love at first shared pizza slice.
- A marriage is just a fancy way to say “forever plus unlimited snacks together”.
Puns for Newlyweds
- We’re on cloud wine in our honeymoon phase.
- I thought getting married meant we’d go to bed earlier… turns out, it’s just Netflix arguments at 2 AM.
- This honeymoon is just one big “suite” life adventure.
- We’re passport-ionate about this trip!
- Sun, sea, and spouse-tacular views.
- From “single and ready to mingle” to “married and ready for snacks”.
- I said “I do,” now I just do whatever my spouse tells me.
- My honeymoon diet plan: Eat, sleep, repeat.
- Every day with you feels like vacation mode: ON.
- We put the “moon” in honeymoon (and the “nap” in vacation).
- I’m just here for the all-you-can-eat love.
- Married life is just one big honeymoon with extra laundry.
- We should change “honeymoon phase” to “eternal snacks and naps phase”.
- Marriage is a journey… luckily, we brought snacks and sarcasm.
- You’re my permanent plus-one to everything, including naps.
- Just two honeymooners, winging it and winning at life.
- Vacationing with your spouse: where “what do you want to eat?” becomes a daily debate.
- We took a vow to always steal each other’s blankets.
- No single riders here, it’s “married and mildly confused” for life.
- Just me, my spouse, and a suitcase full of snacks.
- The honeymoon may end, but the snack battles live on forever.
- “Till death do us part” sounds serious, but let’s start with “till this vacation ends”.
- Love is an adventure, and so is finding the nearest ice cream shop.
- Every honeymoon photo is just proof of how much food we ate.
- One suitcase, two people, zero agreement on what to pack.
Relationship Goals & Everyday Marriage Puns
“Marriage is like a fine wine… it gets better with age (and sometimes needs to breathe).”
- Marriage is 50% love and 50% “Where do you want to eat?”
- Our love story is “Netflix and forever”.
- A successful marriage is all about teamwork, patience, and pretending to listen.
- The best part of being married? Always having someone to blame when you lose your keys.
- We have a “no takebacks” policy, so you’re stuck with me!
- Love is patient, love is kind… love is pretending not to hear snoring.
- I said “I do,” and now I do the dishes too.
- Marriage: the art of deciding what to eat for eternity.
- We’re not arguing; we’re just having a passionate debate about pizza toppings.
- My spouse and I are like two puzzle pieces—sometimes frustrating, but we always fit.
- Love means always sharing the last French fry… even when you don’t want to.
- You’re my happy-ever-after-dinner.
- I’d love you more if you didn’t steal my side of the bed every night.
- They say opposites attract, which explains why one of us is a morning person and the other is a human snooze button.
- We may not be perfect, but we’re perfectly matched in bad dance moves.
- Being married means learning that “Fine” never actually means fine.
- You stole my heart, and now you keep stealing my socks, too.
- The key to a long marriage? Love, trust, and separate blankets.
- Behind every great husband is a wife rolling her eyes.
- My love for you is like WiFi—strong, but occasionally unstable.
- Being married means your arguments go from deep discussions to “You loaded the dishwasher wrong again!”
- Nothing says romance like sharing the same flu symptoms.
- True love is keeping a straight face when your partner tells a terrible joke.
- Marriage is mostly just “Do we have anything to snack on?”
- My wedding vows should have included “I promise to pretend your jokes are funny”.
Anniversary & Growing Old Together Puns
- We’re aged to perfection—just like fine wine and dad jokes.
- Forever isn’t long enough—especially when you have to wait for your spouse to get ready.
- We’re still going strong—just with more naps and fewer late nights.
- Love doesn’t fade, but our eyesight sure does.
- We’re seasoned professionals at this marriage thing.
- Our love is like a classic car—vintage, priceless, and occasionally needs a tune-up.
- Every year together is another chapter in our happily ever after.
- We’re the definition of “relationship goals”—if those goals include early bedtimes and matching socks.
- They say the honeymoon phase fades, but we still make time for spontaneous dessert runs.
- Love grows, but so does the amount of stuff we hoard together.
- True love is when you know exactly how your spouse takes their coffee.
- The best part of growing old together? Still laughing at the same silly jokes.
- “I love you” turns into “Did you remember to take the chicken out of the freezer?”
- Love is eternal… just like the pile of laundry waiting to be folded.
- Marriage is a lifetime supply of “Are you really wearing that?” moments.
- A happy marriage is just an endless cycle of taking turns making coffee.
- Every anniversary is a reminder that you still put up with me!
- Our love is timeless—unlike the fashion choices from our wedding photos.
- After all these years, we still fit together like a fork and spoon (because knives are too dangerous in a disagreement).
- Nothing says commitment like surviving IKEA furniture assembly together.
- A successful marriage is 90% laughter and 10% pretending you didn’t hear that comment.
- Marriage is proof that two people can annoy each other for life and still be madly in love.
Funny One-Liner Marriage Puns
- You’re my happily ever laughter.
- Love at first sight? More like love at first shared dessert.
- Our marriage is knot to be undone!
- The honeymoon phase never ends—as long as we keep ordering takeout.
- You’re my forever and ever… and my favorite co-snacker.
- My love for you is like laundry—it just keeps piling up.
- Marriage: where one person snores and the other suffers.
- You’re my happily ever appetite.
- The only thing stronger than our love is my craving for pizza.
- I fell for you—and you still let me trip over everything in the house.
- You butter believe we’re a perfect pair.
- I’d be lost without you… mostly because you hold the GPS.
- You’re the only person I’d share my fries with… sometimes.
- The only rings I need are you and onion rings.
- Together, we make the perfect blend—like coffee and creamer.
- We’re a love sandwich, and laughter is the filling.
- My heart belongs to you… and so does half of my closet space.
- You stole my heart, and now you steal my hoodies too.
- The perfect marriage? Where one person loves to cook and the other loves to eat.
- I’m wed-ding to you forever!
- Marriage is a lifelong sleepover with your favorite person.
- My vows included “I promise to always steal your fries”.
- Love is patient, love is kind, love is figuring out what’s for dinner every night.
- No returns, no exchanges—you’re stuck with me!
Wedding Party & Best Man Toast Puns
“Marriage is all about compromise… and learning to share the last slice of cake!”
- The maid of honor always has the best maid-ness speeches.
- Being the best man means bringing the best puns!
- A wedding toast is just a sandwich of love and laughter.
- The bride and groom are like cake and frosting—sweet and meant to be together.
- This wedding is a tulle-y magical event.
- Here’s to love, laughter, and happily ever after-dinner dates.
- Marriage: where “for better or worse” really means “I’ll love you even when you snore.”
- The secret to a happy marriage? A good sense of humor and an unlimited snack budget.
- Tying the knot today, untying shoe laces for each other forever.
- Love is in the “heir”—especially if they start a family.
- A perfect couple is like a bride and bloom.
- Let’s raise our glasses to the couple who proves that love isn’t just about finding the perfect person but learning to tolerate their bad jokes!
- This couple is proof that love is not only blind, but also a little bit deaf when it comes to each other’s singing.
- They said “I do”—now let’s dance like nobody’s watching (except the photographer).
- Weddings are proof that love is a fairy tale, but the cake is real.
- May your love be like WiFi—strong, fast, and with no interruptions.
- May your marriage be full of hugs, kisses, and someone always replacing the toilet paper roll.
- Wedding speeches are like marriage itself—short, sweet, and best when they include wine.
In-Laws & Family Marriage Puns
- A happy marriage is when your in-laws become your “in-loves.”
- Love may be blind, but in-laws have 20/20 vision when it comes to judgment.
- The best part of marriage? An unlimited supply of dad jokes from your father-in-law.
- In-laws are just bonus parents who come with free family dinners.
- The true test of marriage? Thanksgiving with the in-laws.
- You marry the person, but you also marry their family’s group chat.
- “Happily ever after” includes Sunday dinner invites and a lifetime of unsolicited advice.
- Love is when your mother-in-law starts saving you the best pieces of cake.
- They say marriage is the joining of two families, which explains why holiday schedules become battle plans.
- If you can survive family game night together, your marriage is built to last!
- Getting married means always having extra holiday events on your calendar.
- They say opposites attract, which explains why one side of the family loves board games and the other loves winning at them.
- When you say “I do,” you’re also saying “I do agree to years of family reunions.”
Love & Romance Puns to Keep the Spark Alive
“A marriage without humor is like a cake without frosting—still good, but missing the best part!”
- You make my heart go ring-a-ling.
- I’m head over vows for you.
- My love for you is like a candle—burning bright, even during power outages.
- We go together like kisses and cake.
- You’re my forever plus-one.
- Our love story is like a playlist—filled with all the right songs and the occasional unexpected remix.
- I’m “knot” letting you go.
- You had me at “Do you want to order dessert?”
- Together, we’re a love story worth bookmarking.
- You’re the missing piece to my happily ever laughter.
- A lifetime of love means forever having someone to split appetizers with.
- Marriage: where romance is real, but so is figuring out who left the wet towel on the bed.
- Love is about supporting each other—even when one of us forgets to take the laundry out of the washing machine.
- My heart beats for you faster than when I see a tray of wedding appetizers.
- They say opposites attract, which explains why I love cuddling and you love stealing the blankets.
Saying “I Do” to Laughs
Marriage isn’t just about love—it’s about sharing a lifetime of laughter, silly moments, and really good snacks. Whether you’re newly married, celebrating an anniversary, or just here for the puns, these jokes are proof that a sense of humor is key to any great relationship.
So, keep the love strong, the jokes rolling, and always remember: a couple that laughs together stays together!
